Day 523 Anxiety Alarm: Worries about Recurrence

January 20, 2015 ~~~ Special Note:
Great News!!  This afternoon the ultrasound results came back and my oncologist called.  There are some issues with my thyroid and throat, but they don't appear to be IBC (inflammatory breast cancer) related. No one wants cancer, but the worst cancer is Stage 4 cancer. Thus, I am so grateful to have my oncologist refer me back to the ENT and Endocrinology. 

Below are my unedited thoughts before I knew the results.  Perhaps it will give you some insight into the worries that race through a cancer survivor's mind when medical troubles brew...

January 17, 2015
This update is being written before I'm willing to post it.  Just thinking about the possibility of recurrence is frightening.  But, before we know whether I'm having a recurrence (the return of cancer), I wanted to jot down my thoughts.

Right after Thanksgiving, I developed a nagging sore throat just on my left side.  By shortly before Christmas, it became so annoying that I begrudgingly went to urgent care.   Urgent Care diagnosed me with strep throat.  Made sense, except that I didn't have a fever and the pain was only on one side.  But, the initial strep test was positive.  So, I was given antibiotics and told to see my doc if things didn't get better. Well, things didn't get better so I called my regular doc.  They referred me to an Ear, Nose, and Throat (ENT) specialist.

The ENT 'scoped' my throat and diagnosed me with a "weird" but non-threatening case of carotidynia.  This is when the sheath of the carotid artery's bifurcation point is inflamed. She prescribed a heavy-duty anti-inflammatory and said I would feel a lot better in a few days.  Well, a few days later I wasn't feeling better but had a check-up with my oncologist so mentioned it to him.  He has ordered an ultrasound of the head/neck/thyroid to either verify the ENT's diagnosis or work more on the puzzle.  Ultrasound is Monday (January 19th).

Gotta say that I'm very nervous.  In fact, that is an understatement.  The thought of going through treatment again is just scary to think about. But I know we need to get answers.  Sore throats on one side don't just linger for 8 weeks without a reason. Hopefully, this is simple and not cancer.  Whatever it is, we will prevail.  Stewart Scott said it best in his ESPY Speech about a year ago, "You beat cancer by how you live, why you live, and in the manner in which you live.  So live!"  If you have six minutes, he is inspiring...

Because this is potentially serious and I promised the kids, from the start, that I would keep them in the loop; I told them.  I hate worrying them with unknowns.  That was hard.  But, we are all optimistic.  I'm hoping my doc is just being cautious and that the anti-inflammatory drugs are just slow to kick in.  We find out Monday.  The doc promised to call me as soon as he gets the results on Tuesday.   

In the mean time...

Day 407 -FINALLY!! A Real Hair Cut!!

My first real haircut in more than a year...   Life is good!

Day 395 - My First Sprint Triathlon

THE TRI-TURTLE-TRI

Last February, my friends, Paula and Mary, challenged me to participate in the Tri-Turtle-Tri, which is a local sprint Triathlon.  Paula and Mary are the best Tri-Buddies (and co-workers).  They encouraged me, laughed with me, motivated me, and never doubted that I could do it. My goals were simple... To finish and to not finish last.

I started training in about mid-April.  With radiation done and the body healing, it was time to start regaining muscle. By the end of May we were even doing lake swims.  I love lake swims.  The lake is so much nicer than the pool.

Things were going along well until mid-July, when my left foot's plantar fasciitis decided to try and stop me from doing the Tri.  Big shout-out to Melissa and Lindsey at the Center for Orthopedic and Lymphatic Physical Therapy.  They kept the plantar fasciitis down to a dull enough roar that I could do the Tri and I especially appreciated the conversations about "stupid pain".  "Stupid pain" is the pain you have to endure when you do things that you know you shouldn't do but you are too stubborn to listen or find an alternative plan.

So, in order to avoid "stupid pain", I had to come up with an alternative way to do the run/walk. Big thanks to Craigslist and the Tri-Turtle-Tri god (Lisa).  Lisa graciously allowed me to do the run/walk portion using a "knee scooter" and Craigslist helped me find one that was 'hurky' enough for the adventure.  Yes, I did the 3.4 mile run/walk portion using a knee scooter.  Actually, I did the route twice... once on race day and once the weekend before so that we knew it was 'doable'.

Well, Sunday, September 14, 2014 was the Tri-Turtle-Tri.  To say I was a little nervous was an understatement.  Big Shout-Out to Stephanie who arrived in time to see me start the swim.  Both kids were there by the time I was transitioning from the bike to the run/walk/knee-scooter portion. Steph, Tom, Mary, Paula, Karen, and several others were there to greet me at the finish.  In fact, the kids already had all my stuff packed up and put in the truck. 

The look on my childrens' faces as they congratulated me were priceless. If I could see a thought bubble above Tom's head, I think it would have read something like, "Wow, if Mom can do this then I think she is really going to be ok." Yup, I think I'm really going to be ok, too.  :-)

I finished 338th out of 339 finishers. Big shout-out to Sue Billings, who was 339.  For next year, my goal is to beat Paula and Mary to the finish line so that I can congratulate them right when they finish!!

Oh, and I have a slightly used knee-scooter, with very low miles, for anyone who has an excuse as to why they can't do something. 

Day 360 - A Special Thank You Poem



Family Time - July 2014

 

“Lessons from the Detour”

Someday you’ll face a mountain
That seems taller than your faith.
You’ll look to God for answers,
Relying on His grace.

He may not answer quickly.
You might wonder if He’s there.
But His Spirit lights the pathway
And you know that He still cares.

You want to cry in anger.
You want to cry in pain.
But then He sends a neighbor,
With laughs and pie… again.

August 2014- Yak Attack!

You worry about your children
Because they’re worried too.
And God inspires your favorite daughter
To insist to go with you.

Your heart is nearly broken
As you see the toll upon your son.
And then God sends his baseball coach
On game day number one.

While the road was tough and daunting,
I was never on my own.
He even sent me online friends
Who are the best sisters I have known!

August 2014 - Life is Good!

The doctors were amazing.
The nurses even more.
And who’d of thought when this got started
Such a blessing was in store.

And now that treatment’s finished,
And life returns to somewhat norm.
I bow my head with gratitude
For the lessons from the storm.

I hope to not repeat this.
And yet I know for sure.
Whatever plan He has for me,
I know I can endure.

But enduring isn’t living.
I shall not live in fear.
For every moment’s precious,
And each day of life I’ll cheer.

Last Day of Active Treatment - August 2014

This poem was a hard one
To open up and share.
But I wrote it to say Thank you,
To God and each of you who care!

I could not do it all myself
Even if I wanted to.
So, “Thank You” Heavenly Father
And Thanks to each of you!

Day 219 - A Bell to Ring in Spring!



What a wild 219 days since diagnosis!  Last radiation treatment was yesterday. "Ringing-Out" also signaled the conclusion of the big three... four months of chemo, BMX surgery, and six weeks of radiation. Feeling great!  Prognosis is great!  And Spring has sprung!

Thank You!

Chemo, Check. Surgery, Check. Radiation, Check. Gratitude for all of you who have shared this journey with me, prayed, helped, and given me the courage and the faith to ring the Bell today... Triple Check!! I could not have done it without all of you.Thank you!!

 

Every cancer patient deserves a great outcome. But so many are not as fortunate as I am. So, instead of feeling deserving, I am simply so grateful for it and for all of you who have made such a difference in this detour.



Today is such a glorious day outside! My heart is so happy that it is bursting out light and warmth across the entire NW!!

 

And, I get to do two of my favorite things today... First, I am going to watch Tacoma Community College (Go Tom!) play Everett Community College (Go Kevin!) in a baseball game.  Then, I'm off to the airport for a vacation... to watch a little Spring Training (Go Mariners!), do a little kayaking, and absorb some real vitamin D.

 

Big shout out to Steph and Tom.  You have been incredible through this whole experience.  I am so proud of you both.  My greatest joy in this life is the honor to be your mom.

 

Big Shout out to Heavenly Father.  Words fail me, but you know my heart is full of gratitude.

Life is good. Keep hope alive!

Day 209 - Triple Plays... Life is Good, Radiation is Almost Done, and it is Baseball Season!!

Just a brief update to let ya'll know that things are going really well.  Finished treatment #22 and #23 of 30 daily radiation treatments today. It was double-dose day (6 hours apart) because the table broke one day in the second week of treatment (I did not break it... I was not even in the building!) and we opted to double-dose one day instead of adding an extra day on at the end.

 

My doctors are amazed at how well I am doing.  I tell them that they underestimated the power of the prayers of my friends and family. Thank you, everyone, for your prayers and good thoughts!!

Last weekend I was feeling so good that I followed Tom's team (TCC) all the way to Pendleton and Walla, Walla. It was so nice to get away and just enjoy a 'normal' Simpson style March weekend.

Had a great time watching Tom and his team play. They won 3 out of 4 games and the sun even peaked out a time or two.  BONUS... for only the second time that I can recall in 14 years of watching baseball, I got to see a triple-play!  Way to go, Titans!!

Day 161 - Surgery and a Perfect Pathology Report!

After the storm comes the rainbow.  What a wild several months of storms and rainbows!

Surgery ...

Surgery went exceptionally well on Thursday, January 16th. The day started with us at the hospital at 5:15am for pre-surgery prep.  By 7:15 or so, I was meeting briefly with the surgeon before going to the operating room.  She set the tone by offering up a sincere prayer that God would guide her hands and her team that day for the best possible outcome.  My blood pressure went down about 20 points with her prayer.  Grateful for a surgeon that knows God and calls upon Him for help.

Surgery went well.  It was time consuming (ended about noon) and that was tough on the kids.  Thankful for Nora, John, and Troy for being there for Steph and Tom.  I woke up about 12:15.  Remember feeling remarkably "ok".  Saw Steph and Tom and then went back to sleep.  Don't remember much else about Thursday, except my room didn't have windows.  By Saturday, I was home resting. 

Back to the Hospital

Was really feeling great, resting at home.  In fact, I was telling friends that I was amazed at how well things felt.  Then the Seahawks game started.  GO HAWKS!  Tom was a few blocks away watching the game with his usual crowd at the Whatleys.  In the middle of the first quarter I started feeling a little queezy and decided to take my temp.  Mild, mild fever 100.0.  As the game progressed, so did my fever.  by the end of the game my fever was 102 and I knew I had to call the doc and would be in the ER for the evening.  Called Tom and asked him to come home.  Called the doc.  Agreed to go to St. Joe's ER.

Once at the ER, I was admitted with an infection in my right side's incision.  The infection responded quickly to antibiotics.  By the morning, my fever was gone.  But my blood work was wonky so I was staying for a bit.

Special shout out to my son, Tom, who took me to the ER and made sure they stayed on track in treating me and getting me up to a room.  For a young man put in such difficult situations these past few months, I'm proud of his maturity and priorities.

 

Special shout out to those who came and visited in the hospital and 'pink'd' up my room with nail polish, hats, and even a pink wrench.

 

Final note on the hospital stay... Technology is pretty cool.  But be careful.  That portable WI-FI EKG monitor is also a tracking GPS.  The nurses know where you go.  We had to negotiate a Diet-Pepsi walk/escape to the 1st floor.

KCA Pathology Report

On Tuesday night, the doc called to tell me about my pathology report.  We got the best possible report!!  An A+.  Lots of dead cancer cells and zero live cancer cells!!  Chemo and the good cells won!!  We KICKED CANCER'S ARSK!!  I cannot tell you how humbling it feels to have so many people praying for success and then to see that success!!  I am so grateful for the power of prayer and the good karma our friends and family enveloped around us the past few months. 
 

 

Sure made the chemo worth it!!

 

Doc still wants 7 weeks of radiation to sweep up any possibility of cancer cells that survived. It only takes one.  Was a little disappointed in that, but it is worth it to get the best chance of not having to go down this road again.

Back Home - On the Mend

Been trying to be patient and rest a lot.  Was doing a good job until Friday night.  Went to the Wolves Basketball game (at home, against CK).  Enjoyed half the game and then headed home for more rest.  Found out later that the Wolves won!  GO WOLVES!!

 

Big shout out to everyone who helped this week and there were so many of you!!  Visits, meals, phone calls, texts, and messages.  You are wonderful!!

 

More later.  Right now, just so grateful for optimistic prospects of many more years to enjoy my family, my friends, and the gift of life.  Thank you, everyone, for sharing this journey with us and for your love and support.