What a chaotic whirlwind the past two weeks have been! This is just not how I planned life at this time.
Friends repeatedly remind me, "You can do this! If anyone can, you can!", with conviction and support. Openly, I agree, and then laugh and say, "Do I have a choice?" Inside my head though, I am thinking, "Holy Seminole, this is going to require some heavy lifting!"
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| Gonna need a little help from my friends! Thanks Marcia, Marty, and Mike! |
Friends repeatedly remind me, "You can do this! If anyone can, you can!", with conviction and support. Openly, I agree, and then laugh and say, "Do I have a choice?" Inside my head though, I am thinking, "Holy Seminole, this is going to require some heavy lifting!"
Do I have a choice? Well, actually I have many choices. Do I fight with all my might? Do I look for the good in others? Will I hide under my blanket (HUMB) for days? Will I curse at the nurse that just poked me three times when one stick should have been enough? Do I self-medicate unnecessarily? Do I get angry with God? Do I take a little risk from time to time and run with scissors (RWS) just for the fun of it? Do I remember my manners? Do I thank Heavenly Father for the richness and goodness that is in my life? Will I ask for help when I need it? So many choices, so much agency in this.
Ultimately, I believe that I will make choices in this fight that are consistent with my internal values. So, not only will I fight for 7300 days, but I will fight fair, fight hard, and fight right! Yes, there is going to be some heavy lifting over the next several months and maybe for a few years. Yes, I'm going to handle it poorly from time to time. But that is LIFE! And I intend to live my life to it's fullest, good days and bad.
If I'm edgy sometimes, please forgive me and kick me in the keester to get out of it. I have choices in the battle each day. I am counting on my friends to help me make the detour choices ones full of hope, graciousness, and love. Not just one choice, but the many choices each day. These choices will determine not just whether I win the war, but the landscape of the battleground, and most importantly (to me) the value in this journey for my family.
So, my first choice is to be a realistic optimist. Even when my breakfast is a bottle full of high contrast barium liquid or my first conversation of the day is with a nurse with a needle! I have choices! I choose to grimace, make a joke, and get it done!!!
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| Breakfast of Champions! PET Scan Juice |
So, my first choice is to be a realistic optimist. Even when my breakfast is a bottle full of high contrast barium liquid or my first conversation of the day is with a nurse with a needle! I have choices! I choose to grimace, make a joke, and get it done!!!
KCA Milestones this past Week:
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| Tests, Needles, Tests, Needles... Necessary to KCA!! |
- Mon - MRI Scan
- Wed - PET/CT Scans
- Wed - Chemo Port Install Surgery
- Fri - Strategy Meeting with Oncologist
- Fri - Baseline Echo-Cardiogram (Surprise! I actually have a heart!)
General Plans for the Week:
- Sat/Sun/Mon - Paint, trip to Cabellas, Chores, HUMB
- Tues - Possibly a biopsy of two 'rogue' lymph nodes.
- Wed - Work, First Day of School in SKSD!! (Happy Happy!), School Board Meeting
- Thurs - Work, likely the first day of KCA Chemo, SKHS Football!!
- Friday - Work
- Sat - HUMB
- Sun -RWS
- Sat/Sun - 10 laps at the SKHS Track
- Mon - 5 laps at the SKHS Track + YMCA
- Tues - 5 laps at SKHS
- Wed -
- Thurs - 3 laps at the visitor's Track before the SKHS game.
- Friday -5 laps at SKHS + YMCA
YOU CAN DO IT!!!! I'm in your cheer squad.
ReplyDeleteWith a lot of help from my friends, yup! Your prayers and good thoughts have been wonderful.
DeleteAlso looking forward to handing the reigns over to you at the end of November. You will do a wonderful job on the school board and I will have more time to focus on getting well!
You are such an inspiration to me and you always have been. You are so deep in my heart as a person and dear friend/acquaintance. I feel so badly for our falling out and I hope it does not upset you that I am so concerned and care for you still, like I always have. I love you greatly and I have every ounce of faith that your strength will see you through the best of what you can be. I am so thankful to have had the chance to get to be friends with you at some point in my life. Even though there was a big misunderstanding of a falling out (in my eyes). I want you to know that I love you and I am very sorry for whatever went wrong between us as friends. I never ever meant to betray you or hurt you. Whatever the case, my heart has never stopped feeling for you and I think you are one smart, awesome, kick a.. person (I dont swear, but ring of it fitted). Be strong and you are in my prayers for sure. You are a testimony to me and you are helping me in ways you will never know.
ReplyDeleteThank you. While I'm not 100% sure who you are, I appreciate all prayers and good thoughts. I hope your life is going well and I hold no acrimony. If this is who I think it might be, please know that you are also on my mind frequently and in my prayers. If I have been a positive influence in your life then I am grateful that our paths crossed and hope that they will someday cross again in a positive way.
DeleteYou know where to find me. :-)